Monthly Archives: October 2021

The Hook, by Dave Smith

 

The Hook

by Dave Smith

There’s a ton of talk about the hook.

Everyone tells me I have to have a hook to begin my story. Without it, no one will read beyond the first page, or maybe the first paragraph.

I’m petrified! What if I can’t find the perfect hook? My writing is doomed. What actually is the perfect hook? At least the perfect one for my story?

I pondered these questions recently as I was out on the lake fishing. With a hook. Hmmm … is there a correlation here I may be missing? Or is a misnomer lurking?

I did what any self-respecting angler would do: I looked it up in the dictionary. Oh, boy.

Hook: (noun) a bent piece of barbed and baited metal; a curved cutting instrument; a short swinging punch; a golf stroke which unintentionally deviates; (verb) attach or fasten; prostitute; the punching and golfing things again; pushing the ball backward with the foot from a rugby scrum (that was new to me too).

Hook phrases: by hook or by crook; get one’s hooks into; give someone the hook (you’re fired!); hook, line, and sinker; on the hook for.

Whew!

I’m not sure I want to do any of those things at the beginning of my story, unless of course my story involves the adventures of a rugby player who was married to a boxer who spent too much money on golf and was forced to become a prostitute to pay the mobster who had his hooks into said rugby player.

I hear you scolding me, “But, but, but … Dave, it also means something designed to catch one’s attention.”

Yes it does. My attention would be caught if an author wrote the first paragraph in red, or upside down, or backward, so why worry about the actual words?

Because, I have deduced, hook is not the descriptor for me. It has too many sharp and undesirable meanings, so I prefer the word engage. Some authors use this nomenclature in their how-to books and articles, and I love it. I even like to say it: Engage. I use my French accent; sounds more seductive.

To me, hooking is a slap on the head saying, “Hey! Look at this! Ain’t it awesome?”

Engaging is a hand held out saying, “Come with me and enjoy this journey.”

Therefore, in Dave’s Rulebook, I have replaced rule #1—you need a hook— with: rule #1—you need to engage your reader. Nothing flashy, no fantastic first sentence, just an authorial finger sliding up the reader’s nose and tickling her brain; wooing her curiosity.

“Semantics … just semantics,” some may huff.

Well, isn’t that what writing is all about in the first place? Go ahead, say it: Engage. Use your French accent.

Author’s note: the first name on the authors-who-use-engage list is Jeff Gerke, and I highly recommend his book The First 50 Pages.

(Editor’s note: the link for Jeff Gerke goes to the Udemy class taught by Jeff. The link was not provided by Dave Smith, nor is it intended to be an endorsement by Dave or myself. The Udemy classes have been recommended in the past by our president, Laura Hernandez.)

Writers Forum is open to submissions for the blog or the e-newsletter.

Type of Material and Guidelines for e-newsletter and Website Submission: 1.) Your articles on the art or craft of writing. 2.) Essays on subjects of interest to writers. (200 words can be quoted without permission but with attribution.) 3.) Book or author reviews. 4.) Letters to the Editor or Webmaster. 5.) Information on upcoming events, local or not. 6.) Photos of events. 7.) Advertise your classes or private events. 8.) Short fiction. 9.) Poetry.

Please submit copy to the editor at writersforumeditor@gmail.com . Electronic submissions only. Microsoft Word format, with the .docx file extension, is preferred but any compatible format is acceptable. The staff reserves the right to perform minor copy editing in the interest of the website’s style and space.

Fridays With Dale: Online Class

Title with image of author

Today we are happy to repeat the first Friday story by Writers Forum member Dale Angel. It posted on July 3, 2020. We had not yet titled the feature ‘Fridays With Dale.’  I had planned to run a Dale Angel story every Friday, at least through that Labor Day. And here we are, over a year later. Thank you, Dale, for helping us get through these trying times!

Geo.

Online Class

by

Dale Angel

I’m taking an online class. The subjects are varied and useful for everyday life. The teacher is well-known, educated and comes with credentials and a title. The instructor’s name is Judge Judy.

I personally learned how to dress for the work environment. You need a white lace collar. It made me realize I need the services of the physical landscaping skills of her surgeon. She looks sixteen and last class she showed up with blond hair, the necessary equipment for the job.

She shows us the value of personal worth by refusing to get involved in domestic affairs…what she calls, “playing house with benefits”. She will not divide up the items fought over like the plaintiff’s toothbrush holder and running shoes or the defendant’s rims off her car. She will not unmingle their toys. She’s not using up her life or education over trivias, especially when both want a refund and compensation on their bad investment. We can all learn something from this.

She’s very astute in unraveling who threw the first punch…and she can identify the keys of rejected lovers who used them to damage the cars belonging to the party of the first part. Her work ethics are so creative when one’s spouse sues, and the problem is from the unemployment that brought it about, her advice is ”just gather cans and hire your own attorney”.

She’s fair. She is a master at identifying manufactured disabilities that her bailiff pays his taxes to support so the disabled party has an income…while surfing. The case of the women who sued for back injury and pain and suffering was enlightening. Judge Judy told her to try climbing down off those shoes, see if that helps…next!

Her practical questions are so skilled you see people tattling on themselves. She is very good to youths who have coping problems, who she says, “lie when their mouths are moving”. She is so kind, she never deprives them of consequences. It shows a great deal of experience in this area. I need to know more about things like this, but at present, I’m underqualified. Never do business without defensive receipts-you will need them for decades because someone may come out of the woodwork.

Save all receipts. Good to know.

Writers Forum is open to submissions for the blog or the newsletter. Please submit copy to the editor at writersforumeditor@gmail.com . Electronic submissions only. Microsoft Word format, with the .docx file extension, is preferred but any compatible format is acceptable. The staff reserves the right to perform minor copy editing in the interest of the website’s style and space.

Type of Material and Guidelines for e-newsletter and Website Submission: 1.) Your articles on the art or craft of writing. 2.) Essays on subjects of interest to writers. (200 words can be quoted without permission but with attribution.) 3.) Book or author reviews. 4.) Letters to the Editor or Webmaster. 5.) Information on upcoming events, local or not. 6.) Photos of events. 7.) Advertise your classes or private events. 8.) Short fiction 9.) Poetry

Editing Help

Writers Forum President Laura Hernandez wanted to pass along a great editing resource she has mentioned in Queen’s Letters. This is from an e-mail Laura received from Reedsy.

Writing isn’t a solo sport. To help your books and stories reach their fullest potential, you may eventually depend on your most trusted teammates: your editors. On the Reedsy blog, we’re revealing how editors can bring out the best in a writer’s work.

The topics we cover in this guide include:

If you’d like us to introduce you to editors who can help you and your book, reply to this email with some information about your project — our team would be more than happy to make some personalized suggestions.

Happy editing,

Martin, Blog Editor @ Reedsy

 

Writers Forum is open to submissions for the blog or the newsletter.

Type of Material and Guidelines for e-newsletter and Website Submission: 1.) Your articles on the art or craft of writing. 2.) Essays on subjects of interest to writers. (200 words can be quoted without permission but with attribution.) 3.) Book or author reviews. 4.) Letters to the Editor or Webmaster. 5.) Information on upcoming events, local or not. 6.) Photos of events. 7.) Advertise your classes or private events. 8.) Short fiction. 9.) Poetry.Please submit copy to the editor at writersforumeditor@gmail.com . Electronic submissions only. Microsoft Word format, with the .docx file extension, is preferred but any compatible format is acceptable. The staff reserves the right to perform minor copy editing in the interest of the website’s style and space.

You Can’t Scare Me, by Dave Smith

 

You Can’t Scare Me

by Dave Smith

My most memorable childhood epiphany was this: a good number of kids’ songs, nursery rhymes and the like were designed to scare the bejesus out of five-year-olds. That’s right, they’re not bedtime stories, they’re scary movies.

Don’t believe it? Then sing along with me: “Don’t go down in the woods today; if you do don’t go alone … ” yeah, see what I mean? Teddy bears picnic my ass. That ditty’s purpose is to make little boys paranoid about the forest so they won’t wander into it.

How about Jack and Jill? Don’t climb up there; you’ll hurt yourself.

Miss Muffet? Spider anyone?

Recently I ascertained another undeniable truth: Famous authors use their notoriety to offer mortifying advice to novices (like me), which is fabricated to discourage neophytes (like me) from writing. Why? Basic economics—it eliminates the competition. And just like the sneaks who prey on kiddies’ fears, they make it sound wholesome.

Not convinced? Let me provide some examples.

“Should take no more than three months.” Stephen King on how long it takes to write a book. Way to crush my resolve, Steve. That’s like running a race against a cheetah. In the desert. Over rocks. Barefoot.

“The first draft of anything is shit.” Why don’t you give me some of your shit, Ernie, so I can revise it and sell it. E. Hemingway with D. Smith—hmmm, nice ring, but sounds fishy. He just didn’t want anyone to write anything.

“I leave out the parts that people skip.” I do that too, Elmore. So far I have 27 words down which I’m pretty sure someone will read and not skip. In King time, I should have four, maybe five, paragraphs completed in the allotted three months.

“Murder your darlings.” That advice was actually meant for a friend who was writing a murder mystery. Over the years it has morphed into boogeyman talk to gin up paranoia, and to get the competition to leave out good parts so their stories will suck.

“Write something every day.”  And if I don’t? Wait, don’t tell me … I’ll never be a success at anything. And because I know there’ll come a day—maybe tomorrow—when I’ll break some part of my writing arm, wrist, hand, finger, pencil, it’s best to not even start.

“Write what you know.” Actually that’s how a lot of ax murderers who write books get caught. I think it’s because at the police academy officers are taught to read. For sure there are no successful ignorami.

Armed with this revelatory knowledge I now pay no attention to successful authors or believe anything I read in self-help books, and I feel much better. My blood pressure is lower, the urge to throw things has lessened, and my constipation has resolved itself. And because there are no rules, my creativity is soaring, my first drafts are award-winning, I retain all my darlings (even the unreadable ones), and if I want to take a day off—or three months off—I do.

I’m also gathering up my courage to go into the woods on teddy bear picnic day.

But I’m bringing my gun.

Writers Forum is open to submissions for the blog or the e-newsletter.

Type of Material and Guidelines for e-newsletter and Website Submission: 1.) Your articles on the art or craft of writing. 2.) Essays on subjects of interest to writers. (200 words can be quoted without permission but with attribution.) 3.) Book or author reviews. 4.) Letters to the Editor or Webmaster. 5.) Information on upcoming events, local or not. 6.) Photos of events. 7.) Advertise your classes or private events. 8.) Short fiction. 9.) Poetry.

Please submit copy to the editor at writersforumeditor@gmail.com . Electronic submissions only. Microsoft Word format, with the .docx file extension, is preferred but any compatible format is acceptable. The staff reserves the right to perform minor copy editing in the interest of the website’s style and space.

Fridays With Dale: The Man with Outlaw Blood

Title with image of author

Dale Angel

 

The Man with Outlaw Blood

By Dale Angel

                                                  

There must be a reason for the name Profanity Lane. Do you suppose it’s because it is a street over from Hard Pan alley? The Oaks and Digger Pines love living there; add Manzanita and Buck brush. They make a cozy environment, especially for Rattlesnakes and Poison Oak.

Yet…at the end of the road is a group of pines nestled together creating a micro climate. When you step on the pine needles, it is soft and damp. It smells like pine resin in the heat of summer. I carry with me the conversation of the man who planted them.

He grew up during the Bonnie and Clyde era, the Daltons, and others like Baby Face Nelson. He talked with such familiarity, leftovers from his childhood. Somehow his blood lines were connected to these outlaws. He was a little boy with a severe cleft pallet and was shoved off not to be seen like a mistreated animal (his words).

His Uncle, his only advocate, was kind but he died. He left eighty acres to him. He sold it, put the money in his pocket, and walked to Kansas City. He knocked on doors until he found a doctor to fix his problem. It was as good a job as was available in those days. He was fourteen. His speech was impaired, but his joy in being able to communicate for the first time made up for it.

I teased him, calling him ‘the man with outlaw blood.’  A few minutes spent sharing thoughts made him happy. His humble graciousness made you happy to be in his presence.

He took home free Pines from the Arbor Day and Forestry trees and planted them in the Hard Pan among rocks. He put plastic pipes next to each tree. Every day, especially in the summer time, he put the hose inside the plastic pipes and deeply watered them. The trees began to cover the rocks. Today they tower over his yard. Shade is everywhere.

Profanity Lane and Hard Pan Alley off Keswick have history. I went to check on his project the street signs are no longer there, but his trees are.

A little house sits at the end of the road. In their front yard is a forest that is so wonderful to walk in it. The years have made the trees larger. The Perkins used to live there before they died. We never talked well, but we made social smiles and some transfer of material to share this with you.  Coming up Keswick to a half mile to Lake Blvd the first road right will end in huge trees. It has been built up no one knows this history.

 

Dale Angel

 

 

Writers Forum is open to submissions for the blog or the newsletter.

Type of Material and Guidelines for e-newsletter and Website Submission: 1.) Your articles on the art or craft of writing. 2.) Essays on subjects of interest to writers. (200 words can be quoted without permission but with attribution.) 3.) Book or author reviews. 4.) Letters to the Editor or Webmaster. 5.) Information on upcoming events, local or not. 6.) Photos of events. 7.) Advertise your classes or private events. 8.) Short fiction 9.) Poetry

Please submit copy to the editor at writersforumeditor@gmail.com . Electronic submissions only. Microsoft Word format, with the .docx file extension, is preferred but any compatible format is acceptable. The staff reserves the right to perform minor copy editing in the interest of the website’s style and space.