I Think I Need Soap Weed
By Dale Angel
While hiking between stacked walls of the local big box store, I got lost. I was looking for laundry detergent. After traveling through a valley and a gorge, I came to what I was searching for: a whole canyon size wall of possibilities.
Over my head were boxes of Joyful Expressions, Simple Pleasures, Sunburst, Aloha Splash, Fresh Linen, Island Fresh–Sparkling Ocean and Spring Lavender.
Near the eye level area were the Stain Lifters, Action’s Free and Gentle, High Efficiency Original, Multi-Action the 2x Concentrate, Free and Clear and Apple Mango. Seventh Generation, Rinso, Precious Clean, no…I think that one was called Supreme Clean. Eye level shelf space is premium at the market place. Products move faster from there.
Dropping to the floor level were Touch and Softness, Every Day Elegance, Dual Actions, The Power of Nature–Tropical Passion, White Linen, and Mountain Breeze.
Mingled among the boxes were bleaches. Classic Purex, Color Guard Ultra Cheer (I’m not sure if this is a soap or bleach). Renuzit was another iffy one.
My travels took me into territory I was acquainted with, names like Era, Gain, Dreft, Tide, Surf, Arm and Hammer, Whisk, All, and Cheer. These older brands I recognized.
Almost every store have their own house brands too.
I would date myself if I asked for Duz. It was supposed to be soap that didn’t require you to rinse your laundry. I can testify it didn’t work.
However, I didn’t fall for those little blue balls selling for outrageous money sold with promises you never have to buy laundry soap again. The man that sold those got some prison time plus a mansion in Florida. There are some areas of life I made good decisions.
I quit looking. Too many choices. I used to like Feld Naptha. That was real soap wasn’t it? I started out for detergent–that’s what I’ll get. Just give me any kind. They’re all the same, just different names………What is Soap weed? I think I need Soap weed.
Where is the trail out of this place?
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