Dogs, Cats, and Earthquakes

By: Dale Angel

Could it be an Earthquake that’s wondering around underground looking for a place to re-arrange the earth? Because the neighborhood dogs are all barking at once.

Dogs can surprise you; they like disturbing the peace.

One neighbor down the street got two huge mastiffs to compete with her friend, whose little tiny dogs make up for their size by yapping endlessly. This quartet is off key.

Clyde’s dog wants so bad to join the others but he’s trained to a submissive trembling whiny whimpering high pitch scream. The Canine Baritones out do themselves to harmonize with this

Since Alex’s son moved back home, they each got a dog, to bark. They were to be used for guards, but if you’re not careful you could step on them.

The couple up the street moved out the furniture and put down a mattress for their three huge dogs. They never let them out, except at night, watch your step! There must be a dog tournament going on.

My friend who lives on the corner took care of the problem of yellow grass on her lawn after the visits of the locals. She found a use for her giant cactus plants…she cut off parts and placed them all around the edge of her property. Very effective.

New people moved in. They brought two German Shepherds and one Pit Bull, and every time their separation anxiety kicks in, all three sees who can out do the other. Then wait for George across the alley to yell in a full bodied voice: “Shut Up!” Few admit their pets participate in this undisciplined behavior.

The cats Ringo owns were quieter. They slip up on the porch to sit on the freshly laundered pillows on the outdoor furniture after they sprayed the sliding glass door. He has seventeen warnings from animal control although he denied ownership. House cats let out at night seek…fresh garden lettuce and new planted areas. To be fair, they are a mild threat to gophers. I’ve heard.

I became an expert at a professional level setting out Wal-Mart Industrial-Sized Mouse Traps to set on the pillows. It caused retaliation. They came back revengeful…with family. Heavy duty water shooters, like kids use to play with, work pretty good, but I was so outnumbered, after a while my trigger finger wore out, but I kept up my status as an Expert Mouse Trap Setter. It entitles me. I’m still a player… not a victim.

Many Cats are sopranos–one Octave off hysteria. Every other night they fornicated when their temperature was a bit off. They left blood on the door steps after the fights; meanwhile, they lurked under the porch looking for a place to have babies.

Today it’s quieter. Last night’s news reported a small Earthquake off the coast.

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